Although it is a sector of the population that already existed for a long time, with the arrival of the coronavirus it was further enhanced. If action is not taken in time, it can complicate family relationships.
Human relationships are the most essential thing that a human being has. Perhaps the starting point to be able to enjoy a huge number of emotions, good and bad, but situations in the end, which allows us to communicate and carry on life as we know it, but we must be careful because it is a path that has some stones to avoid.
Although it had already existed for a long time, with the arrival of the Coronavirus pandemic, the so-called sandwich generation was further enhanced, that is, those members between 35 and 50 years old who must take care of both their parents and their children and are usually left in the middle of a conflict of parties, by demand of one party or another which, in most cases, tends to cause another rift: the emotional one in the family.
Word of a specialist in the field
To have a real parameter of this social phenomenon that has existed for a long time, Crónica spoke with Mauricio Strugo (MN41.436), a graduate in psychology and clinical sexologist, who revealed what this particular fact of our life means, and what can cause certain havoc if it is not considered: The Sandwich Generation is a concept introduced by a social worker in the United States in the 1980s, which names the place occupied by adults who have to be in the middle of caring for their children and older adults, who would be the parents. At that time it was said that the sandwich generation was in their 30s, and today, the issue is that they are between 35 and 50 years old, that various phenomena happened, on the one hand, we have postponed motherhood, that is, that each time we have older children and from 35 and 40 years old, after being installed at work or in different situations, and on the other hand, the quality of life of older adults has been extended, therefore, they live longer time and with a good quality of life.
The professional added with great forcefulness that there was always the situation of having to take care of, what happens is that older adults, since there were not so many technological resources, medicine, and vaccines did not have such a long life span, at 60 or 70 years of age. at most, people died, and at the same time, people who are adults, at 20 or 25 years old were parents, and this situation worsened and was presented with much more force today, and above all, also in the current situation that we live with the coronavirus, where there is also this situation of saying I am going to take care of my parents who need me, I stay with my family who needs me, that is, how to contain both parties, with the emotional need that contact implies.
What happened with the arrival of the Coronavirus?
Precisely, when asked about how this was experienced with the arrival of the Covid, Strugo said that it was strengthened because when it was the strictest quarantine, our parents were alone in many cases without having learned to use technology to communicate virtually, so we have I had to go visit them, accompany them to doctors, in a large epidemiological situation with all the risk that that means, and knowing that in our house they also needed us to continue caring for the boys to do the Zoom, let's make lunch, while our partner I was cleaning the house or working.
Regarding what effects this phenomenon causes, the lawyer (@ mauriciostrugo) reported that in principle, being in the middle is a negative effect, because it causes the person who is involved in this place to feel pressured by this double loyalty that He has to have those parents who gave him life and, on the other hand, the family that he decided to build. It is inevitable that the person who is there is distressed at times and may end up with a nervous breakdown, that at times is with panic attacks, different situations that can occur due to these stressful situations. The issue is how to manage and how to manage so that this does not happen, that is, how to take care of this whole situation.
Recommendations to keep in mind
Meanwhile, the specialist left advice for those people who are in this situation, and who are currently overcome by it: What they have to try to do is work the guilt, because it is important that all of us do it, we do it from love, we do it because we want to do it and not from obligation. This of course will give us guilt because we will feel that something is expected of us and we are not doing it, but it is preferable to do something from the election, than to be resentful when we do something, therefore, what we have to do is give quality of time to the people who need us, that is, if we are with our children, at that moment we put aside our phones, our obligations and spend a while there, truly playing with them, and if we are with our older adults, that there are situations that we will not be able to choose and we will have to accompany them urgently.
The health professional added in this regard, with great forcefulness that at the same time, it is important that just as we offer ourselves to each of the parties, we also take care of ourselves, because to take care of others we also have to take care of ourselves themselves. Taking care of yourself also means having personal time, in this challenge of being to one side or the other, at times to take breaks and rest, to be able to do some sport, to be able to relax, to be able to do something that we like so that we can sharpen ourselves as an instrument. , because if we are not well, it is very likely that we do not have patience, that we mistreat, that the things we do reluctantly, do not have a good effect.
The wear and tear that society has been wearing due to the permanence of the Covid for just over a year, further complicated human relationships between family, friends, and work and study colleagues in various ways, so it will be very important to be able to have patience and understanding to not be in the middle of two generations: that of our parents and grandparents, and that of our children, because both are important in a person's life and it will be necessary to know how to balance the emotional balance.
Sandwich Generation: Understanding Above All
A key point for those who make up this group is the understanding of both parties, to which Strugo said that it would be ideal but at some point, it is not possible, because boys are boys and they demand like boys, there is something especially when they are little. That it is difficult for them to understand that parents work and they want time, and as much as they understand that we work to receive money, the truth is that what happens to them is that they want you to be with them. So they do not understand beyond what we tell them, and it is necessary that we do, that we are going to Grandma's because she does not feel well and we are taking care of her.
The specialist added that in the same way as our parents if they are conscious, they can also do this, there are cases with people with dementia, Alzheimer's, or a situation that requires support that is difficult, and in those cases, it is necessary to think about having caregivers, in which some cases exist nursing homes, although it seems that a person who sends another to a nursing home is a bad child or person, there are complicated situations that, because of affection, we find it difficult to set limits.